Daily Success
Institute in Basic Life Principles

Command 23 : Fear God, Not Man | Day 161

Conquer the Fear of Loneliness!

I was stunned when a friend informed me that his 60-year-old mother was packing her bags and moving to England to marry a man whom she had never met, never talked to, and had never even seen. I asked, "Is she rational?" He said, "Absolutely!" I asked, "How did this happen?" He explained that she had met him on the Internet, and although their communication with each other had been only through e-mails, they had formed a deep bond that was extraordinary.

There is no doubt that loneliness is a powerful force in the lives of many people. It can be a positive thing if we respond to it correctly. Often, a feeling of "emptiness" motivates a person to recognize a void in his life and begin seeking for an intimate and personal relationship with God through salvation. This is fitting, because the ultimate reality of loneliness is eternal separation from God.

Loneliness is the result of not having anyone with whom we can share our innermost thoughts and feelings.

For the believer, fear of loneliness can be conquered by remembering the truth that we are never really alone. God has promised “... I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee” (Hebrews 13:5). When we experience times of loneliness, we should use them as an opportunity to “draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you ...” (James 4:8). We have an incredible friend in the Lord Jesus Christ, Who “sticketh closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24).

Loneliness becomes a "friend" when it motivates us to seek the fellowship of God as much as we would seek the fellowship of others.

In addition to recognizing God's desire to draw us closer to Himself, we need to see loneliness as His signal to also cultivate meaningful relationships with other people. God wants the members of the body of Christ to be interdependent and to share a oneness with each other (see Romans 12:5). Although Adam had an intimate relationship with the Lord, God still stated, “It is not good that the man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18).

I know many lonely individuals who are around people all day long. Therefore, the solution for loneliness is not simply being around people, but it is enjoying the heart-to-heart fellowship that is a part of discipleship. When we reach out to others by discipling them for the Lord, we will experience the same fulfillment that the Apostle Paul spoke of when he referred to his disciples as his “joy and crown" (Philippians 4:1).

Let's use loneliness to our advantage by allowing it to drive us closer to God and motivate us to look for those whom He would want us to disciple. For your journal entry this week, ask each member of your family what types of fears they have. Then, discuss with them the practical steps to deal with those fears, and record the results of their actions. As you do this, you will be discipling them and cultivating some of the most meaningful relationships God has given you!

“Fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matthew 10:28).

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Contributing writer: Bill Gothard